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You Sure Are A Lot Uglier In Person

February 17, 2011

Inside Counsel Magazine has a humor feature called Strange Suits. Each month they send me summaries of four oddball lawsuits. I sketch out ideas, the editors pick the one they like best.

And the winner is: Subcribers are suing an online matchmaking company, claiming many of the site’s profiles are inactive or fake. They claim the bogus profiles are used
as bait to get people to join and pay a monthly subscription fee. Scroll down to see the sketches for all four cases.

woman testifying in court about an online dating service where the photos posted on the site were deceiving

IHOP, the International House of Pancakes, decided to drop a suit against the International House of Prayer, a church using the same acronym: IHOP. The pancake house had originally claimed trademark infringement, and argued that
the public might associate the pancake house with a particular faith.International House of Pancakes sued International House of Prayer for having same acronym

A suit involving rival kitty litter manufacturers. An ad campaign claimed that cats prefer one brand to the other. Arm & Hammer is arguing that Clorox’s independent study– which involved cats choosing between two litter boxes– was in litter box testifying in court in a lawsuit involving rival kitty litter manufacturers

Congressman Dennis Kucinich is suing a Congressional cafeteria over a “dangerous” sandwich wrap it sold him in 2008. Kucinich is suing for $150,000, and claims the sandwich contained unpitted olives which caused dental injuries, pain and suffering. Congressman Dennis Kucinich sued cafeteria over a dangerous sandwich with unpitted olives that damaged his teeth

And here’s the original sketch for the matchmaking site with the phony profiles:class action lawsuit against a matchmaking company which contends that many of the site profiles are inactive or fake

143 Comments leave one →
  1. gargpk permalink
    February 22, 2011 3:36 PM

    Your sketches are real comments. Enjoyed.


  2. The Compulsive Writer permalink
    February 22, 2011 3:37 PM

    These are great! I once found a pit in a Lean Cuisine entree that had olives in it. I took a pic of it because I thought I should but didn’t do anything about it. Who knows, maybe that could have been my (insert count Dracula voice here) one million dollar law suit? Mooo haaahaaa!


    • February 22, 2011 8:06 PM

      I’ve never received a comment in a, er, Countess Dracula voice. It was pretty scary, but… thoroughly enjoyable! And I’m very glad you weren’t injured by The Pit From The Lean Cuisine– which sounds like a true horror!! Many thanks for your good-humored visit.


      • The Compulsive Writer permalink
        February 23, 2011 12:32 AM

        You haven’t??? Doesn’t everyone do that? 🙂


        • February 23, 2011 12:08 PM

          Alas, very few people post comments in vampire voce. It’s a rather, er, cryptic talent, possessed by only the special few. So take a bow– moooo hahaaaa!


  3. February 22, 2011 3:38 PM

    I love your site….the pictures are great – Thank you!


    • February 22, 2011 8:08 PM

      You are entirely too kind– but I mustn’t protest too much… : ) I’m very happy you stopped by– thank you!


  4. February 22, 2011 3:42 PM

    Oh you Americans….. life would be only half as fun without all the suing….
    I would be interested in how the kitties got lured into choosing Clorox’s kitty litter….poop here get a treat?


    • February 22, 2011 8:15 PM

      Yes, why do Americans keep suing each other?? We need a new hobby, that’s clear… : ) Your theory about the litter box competition sounds all too plausible– and very funny! Many thanks for stopping by.


  5. February 22, 2011 3:44 PM

    I like the matching profile lawsuit the best and it is true.


    • February 22, 2011 8:18 PM

      They say the truth is often spoken in jest– I guess that’s why we laugh… : ) Many thanks for your kind comment.


  6. February 22, 2011 4:02 PM

    Excellent illustration and writing!


  7. February 22, 2011 4:03 PM

    hahahahahahaha.. dat was hi-llllllllllll-arious!


    • February 22, 2011 8:21 PM

      I love “hearing” people laugh– even in writing! Many thanks for your good-humored support!


  8. DawneeJo permalink
    February 22, 2011 4:13 PM

    Listen, my cats, Pedro and Evita, are willing to testify that in fact one kitty litter is better then the other (to protect themselves they will not identify which kitty litter is better.) My cats are remaining quiet on IHOP issue because I think they too are using that acronym (International House of Pussy). As far as Congressman, the cats he is full of pit. Loved your sketches!


    • February 22, 2011 8:25 PM

      Just knowing there are two cats out there named Pedro and Evita is making me smile… : ) Clearly they are felines with strong opinions. Many thanks for your kind and good-humored support!


  9. February 22, 2011 4:26 PM

    I love your site!


    • February 22, 2011 8:35 PM

      Coming from a spirited humorist like yourself, that’s a high compliment– thanks a heap, blog on!!


  10. February 22, 2011 5:39 PM

    Ha! Pretty funny. Did you do the comics yourself?


    • February 22, 2011 8:36 PM

      Yes, I’m afraid I must take full responsibility for the comics– please don’t take me to court!! : ) Many thanks for stopping by.


  11. February 22, 2011 5:57 PM

    You’re brilliant with these sketches! I had a good laugh. K


    • February 22, 2011 8:40 PM

      Now, now, you mustn’t encourage me. Wait, what am I saying– of course you must!! : ) Very glad you enjoyed the sketches, thanks so much for your kind comment.


  12. February 22, 2011 6:00 PM

    Ridiculous lawsuits are ridiculous! But that’s the American way I suppose. I think the Dating website case could hold up, if they have proof the company put up the fake profiles, instead of subscribers lying about their looks.


    • February 22, 2011 8:48 PM

      Yes, it sounds like a tricky case– let’s hope no one hauls me into court to testify… : ) Many thanks for stopping by.


  13. February 22, 2011 6:22 PM

    Well written Write-up. Glad i am able to locate a site with some knowledge plus a great writing style.
    You keep publishing and i will continue to Keep browsing

    Thanks Again


    • February 22, 2011 8:59 PM

      Blush, blush! Thank you very much indeed for your kind comments. I’m glad you enjoyed your visit, and I hope I shall have the pleasure of your company again… : )


  14. February 22, 2011 6:55 PM

    Some of these lawsuites are crazy. Thanks for sharing the cartoons.


    • February 22, 2011 9:01 PM

      Yes, there never seems to be a shortage of bizarre lawsuits– which is lucky for me, of course… : ) Thanks so much for stopping by.


  15. February 22, 2011 7:20 PM

    Great stories, and the twist you put on the winning picture is phenomenal. The look on the judge’s face really sells it. 😀 Very nice work, and congratulations on being Freshly Pressed!


    • February 22, 2011 9:07 PM

      Ah, Tim, you’re too kind– thanks so much. Yes, that look of chagrin– I’ve had it many times myself! Being Freshly Pressed came as a complete shock– the best part is, I’ve gotten to meet so many great people. Cheers!


  16. February 22, 2011 7:40 PM

    really like it


  17. February 22, 2011 7:47 PM

    rofl awesome cartoons 🙂
    We sure have seen a lot of those sites around


    • February 22, 2011 9:12 PM

      Yes, we need fewer matchmaking sites, and more cartoon sites– that’s my completely unbiased opinion… : ) Glad you enjoyed the sketches, thanks a lot for stopping by.


  18. February 22, 2011 7:52 PM

    Truth is always stranger than fiction.


  19. February 22, 2011 8:04 PM



    • February 22, 2011 9:17 PM

      Careful now, you’ll be giving me a swelled head. Oops, too late… : ) Many thanks for your enthusiastic support!


  20. February 22, 2011 8:11 PM

    this is hilarious… i love it.


    • February 22, 2011 9:24 PM

      Ah, you’ve given me a warm feeling– and that’s not so easy to do in New Hampshire on a cold winter night in February!! : ) Many thanks for stopping by.


  21. February 22, 2011 8:42 PM

    Hilarious. Every single one of those are dead on. My favorite has to be Clorox v. Arm and Hammer, maybe because I have a cat too?


    • February 23, 2011 10:45 AM

      Thank you very much indeed. Yes, cat ownership may have given you a slight bias, but it can’t be helped… : ) Thanks for stopping by!


  22. artsreymao permalink
    February 22, 2011 8:56 PM

    so nice sketch….


  23. February 22, 2011 9:53 PM

    Thank you for sharing the four drafts! Also, since they are suing over what seems like weird cases, maybe it’s time they got a little publicity, no? 😀


    • February 23, 2011 10:50 AM

      Publicity– uh-oh, you’re right. I shouldn’t encourage them… : ) Many thanks for your good-humored comment!


  24. February 22, 2011 10:00 PM

    What great stuff! Your style is clean, simple, and expressive. Those are classic traits that a lot of today’s artists seem to forget about while developing their hyperuse of crosshatching. And above all, you know how to tell a story in a single panel.


    • February 23, 2011 10:53 AM

      Blush, blush, I feel something burning, I think it’s my smiling face! Thank you for your very kind comments, I shall struggle to live up to them… : )


  25. thumbles permalink
    February 22, 2011 10:05 PM

    Your illustrations are brilliant. Every time I memorise a case I try to do a drawing. Sadly, my artistry isn’t on the same level as yours. Even if it were, the cases aren’t really that interesting!


    • February 23, 2011 10:57 AM

      I’m sure you’re being entirely too modest. I like to think all drawing is a worthy effort, and a step in the right direction. Hope you’ll keep at it. Many thanks for your kind support!


    • vikeau permalink
      February 23, 2011 11:12 AM

      Why are you trying to memorize cases? Although I use to make up little dittys to remember legal princples like res ipsa locquitor. Anyway the illustrations are top notch. Any chance of setting some of them to music?


      • February 23, 2011 10:00 PM

        Memorize cases? I can hardly remember my passwords… : ) Res Ipsa Locquitor? Sounds like a sure #1 that would, um, speak for itself… : ) The only illustration I’ve set to music is this group caricature of the Dave Clark 5. Just scroll down to the third image and hit the Play button. Thanks a lot for stopping by!


  26. February 22, 2011 10:20 PM

    Ha, these make me laugh. Oh, what us Americans will do for money.

    Love your artwork. Even not knowing the backstory of the cases, it would be easy to surmise what’d happened. Great job and congrats on FP’d! 🙂


    • February 23, 2011 11:18 AM

      Ha! I never thought I’d be FP’d… : ) I feel like I should be walking down the street wearing a big orange juice carton! Thank you so much for your very kind comments.


  27. February 22, 2011 10:27 PM

    I like the one about IHOP. Everybody gets pancakes!

    I’m subscribing to your blog because I like things that make me smile and laugh, and you give out tips, too. I wonder if men realize how sexy a lot of women think a sense of humor is?


    • February 23, 2011 11:27 AM

      Women think a sense of humor is sexy? I’m glad you told me– I’m going to come out of my corner where I’ve been sitting behind the potted plant… : ) Thanks so much for subscribing– I shall do my best to keep you smiling.


  28. February 22, 2011 10:47 PM

    I’m suing you for making me feel bad because I can’t draw.

    And because Mom always liked you better.


    • February 23, 2011 11:29 AM

      Mom always liked me best? I think you’re channeling Tommy Smothers! Thanks for stopping by and making me laugh.


  29. February 22, 2011 11:04 PM

    hi Mark,
    Keep Writing and sketching this is wonderful site to stop by LEARN and LAUGH.



  30. A. Stevens permalink
    February 22, 2011 11:09 PM

    I once found a pit in my TV dinner– boy am I glad I didn’t find a pendulum.
    But in all seriousness, I enjoyed the humor in your post. The cartoons require no caption; a trait few cartoonist do not possess.



    • February 23, 2011 11:37 AM

      Pit, pendulum– I can see yours is a very Poetic nature… : ) Thanks so much for your support and very kind comments.


  31. February 22, 2011 11:26 PM

    Aha so what you trying to say is that american society has become based on an single idea, an idea where “sometimes you just gotta say… wtf” is at the core; and the outcome is, naiveness and obscurity. In the sense that petty things, vanity, social stature, social acceptance and who can make the quickest buck, screwing people over flourish and people are no longer real because the true nature of realism in the general populous is the minority, and the pop culture that has become america is worried about their own individual wants, not their needs or the needs of anybody else as a whole. Individualism with the illusion of freedom so in return we are a country of sheep, just following the herd, being comfortable but unaware of our broken society, broken american culture, which is tainted and unrealistic.

    “When power leads man toward arrogance, poetry reminds him of his limitations. When power narrows the areas of man’s concern, poetry reminds him of the richness and diversity of his existence. When power corrupts, poetry cleanses, for art establishes the basic human truths which must serve as the touchstone of our judgement.” JFK


    • February 23, 2011 11:42 AM

      I had no idea I was saying all that– I’m gonna have to go look at those sketches again… : ) Many thanks for stopping by.


  32. February 22, 2011 11:44 PM

    As someone who has used online dating services in the past, I believe there is a bait and switch mentality going on, or that some of the “profiles” aren’t real. How else can I explain lack of responses? lol

    Thanks for the post and congrats on being freshly pressed!


    • February 23, 2011 11:50 AM

      Someone as witty as yourself deserves a phenomenal response– never doubt it. Thanks for your very gracious and good-humored comments!


  33. February 22, 2011 11:58 PM

    This is funny. A little adjustment on the pictures and it tells a whole different story


  34. February 23, 2011 12:17 AM

    Lovely sketches. Though all in the courtroom scenarios – would have preferred some variety.


    • February 23, 2011 11:59 AM

      Point taken. Early on, I tried different settings, including those completely outside a courtroom. However, the editors have always preferred a courtroom scenario, and over time it’s become the standard for the feature. Many thanks for stopping by.


  35. February 23, 2011 1:13 AM

    Wow. Excellent idea. The way you discuss the four problem of the societies.

    The pictures for depicting the ideas are awesome. Especially the dental surgery one 🙂


  36. February 23, 2011 1:28 AM

    Haha !! awesome!


  37. February 23, 2011 3:00 AM

    Great stuff!
    I did some internet dating: in fact, met my wife that way, but I did meet a fair number of mis-reresentations as well . . .

    The very idea of ‘rival kitty litter manufacturers. ‘ made me smile!

    My favourite lawsuit was when Philip Glass sued Audi for using a piece of music for a TV commercial, taken from one of Glass’ works. The judge rejected the claim on the basis that he couldn’t see that the music of Philip Glass had anything notable or distinctive about it . . .


    • February 23, 2011 5:44 PM

      Glad to hear your internet dating experience ended on a happy note. Your Philip Glass anecdote made me laugh. Some judges really know how to hurt a guy… : ) Many thanks for your good-humored comments.


  38. February 23, 2011 3:59 AM

    Mark Loved the blog!! Congrats on being Freshly Pressed, well deserved.

    I love cartoons. I have an animated cartoon that I do every Saturday on my blog, I use xtranormal, so I don’t have any original drawings on there, but maybe you can draw me singing or something…..I would like that .

    Thanks again for the very fun blog read today. I like!




    • February 23, 2011 5:50 PM

      Thanks so much, Ava, I really appreciate your kind comments. Your blog sounds intriguing, I shall take a look. Wishing you all the best!


  39. February 23, 2011 4:49 AM

    Your sketches are so amazing. They are so descriptive, no text was required to get what was being said in the sketches.


    • February 23, 2011 5:54 PM

      Now, now, you mustn’t encourage me, I’ll only draw up more foolishness… : ) Thanks so much for your kindness and support!


  40. February 23, 2011 6:29 AM

    very inspiring and well thought!
    nice illustration as well ! i guess it was from such as great sense of humour that the truth behind the sketches was not so bitter to swallow but fun to accept and work on to make the world a better place…
    Keep it up! really love it^_^


    • February 23, 2011 7:30 PM

      What a lovely compliment, thank you. There’s a place for satire and biting humor, but I think the best (healthiest) laughter comes when we laugh at ourselves (universal human foibles) rather than at other people. I fear you’re giving me too much credit, but I shall try to live up to your very kind assessment.


  41. February 23, 2011 6:55 AM

    hahaha PERPECT! ‘ love it!


    • February 23, 2011 7:34 PM

      Ah, it’s always great to “hear” the sound of laughter– even in writing… : ) Thank you very much for your kind comment!


  42. jocazplamenco permalink
    February 23, 2011 7:05 AM

    this is so humorous and funny!


  43. February 23, 2011 7:17 AM

    haha, very nice


  44. February 23, 2011 8:17 AM

    Great sketches. The idea is also fun and brilliant.


    • February 23, 2011 7:43 PM

      Those are the kind of compliments that can go to an illustrator’s head. Good thing I’m willing to live dangerously… : ) Thanks very much for your kind support!


  45. February 23, 2011 8:57 AM

    Many thanks for the many thanks. I appreciate your illustrations, but most of all I appreciate the many thanks, thank you.


  46. February 23, 2011 9:16 AM

    i am subscribed to “freshly pressed”. Now guess where i find this blog? Your illustrations are awesome. I wish the local newsletter in Ethiopia has humor feature called strange suits, which will probably be empty week after week. The lawsuits in here are as fun as in America anyway. But you are absolutely right: Humor multiplies its power 🙂


    • February 23, 2011 7:58 PM

      After reading your comment, I shall always think of Ethiopia as a place where humor is alive and well– because you, my friend, are living there. Thank you for your kind comment, and for helping to multiply the humor here at my blog! : )


  47. February 23, 2011 9:41 AM

    Great pictures! You are quite the artist. Keep up the good work!


    • February 23, 2011 8:08 PM

      Keep up the good work… I shall certainly do my best, thanks to your very kind encouragement. I sincerely appreciate your support!


  48. February 23, 2011 10:05 AM

    Good stuff! The title is catchy 🙂


    • February 23, 2011 8:10 PM

      That’s a pretty catchy title you’ve got there yourself!! : ) Thanks a lot for stopping by!


  49. February 23, 2011 10:12 AM

    this is absolutely hilarious and i love the twist in the tale in the last picture!


    • February 23, 2011 8:15 PM

      Your kind support and enthusiasm have hurled across the Atlantic and been gratefully received here in New Hampshire– many thanks!


  50. February 23, 2011 10:30 AM

    As someone who has dated online, all I can say is: I know that guy in your picture!!! The one on the right, definitely not the left…

    Great illustrations. Thank you for sharing — can’t wait to poke around your site a bit more! 🙂


    • February 23, 2011 8:23 PM

      Yes, why is it always the guy on the right who shows up?? Mr. Right is never the guy on the right! : ) Thanks for your kind comment and good humor– the welcome mat is always out for you here!


  51. mysoulforsale permalink
    February 23, 2011 12:50 PM

    I love your illustrations… they’re great, and they all make excellent points. Thanks for sharing!


    • February 24, 2011 7:54 AM

      You’re very welcome. Glad you enjoyed the sketches, and thanks very much for your kind and supportive comment!


  52. February 23, 2011 12:59 PM

    Enjoyed your drawings, loved the one with the judge spitting out pits. Congrats on being freshly pressed.


    • February 24, 2011 7:59 AM

      Spitting out pits– let’s hope it doesn’t become a new craze! : ) I sincerely appreciate getting your lovely note from Rumbley Cottage– thank you!


  53. February 23, 2011 1:11 PM

    This is fantastic. The messages in all of your comic sketches are spoken straight away as soon as you see them. I really enjoyed the matchmaking one, definitely brought a big smile to my face.

    It’s also great to see black and white sketches, it’s a rare sight most of the time unless you’re looking at newspapers.


    • February 24, 2011 8:10 AM

      I enjoy the chance to work in B&W that this feature gives me. I’ve always liked the classic pen and ink wash look of “golden age” magazine cartoons. Like old films, they seem to have a kind of power one can’t capture with color. Thanks for your very kind comments, I sincerely appreciate your support!


  54. February 23, 2011 1:15 PM

    Wow! I’m always amazed when someone can put ideas onto paper in the way that you do. Much as a baker makes an amazing cake, but you don’t have a recipe! I’m truly impressed! Are you syndicated? Your cartoons should be in newspapers across the land! Peace, T.


    • February 24, 2011 8:18 AM

      After reading your comment, I’ve decided to wear a chef’s hat while I work… : ) Must confess, not all my recipes work– I’ve had many cakes that fell flat! Never had any luck with syndication, sad to say, but bolstered by your enthusiastic support, I shall press on… : ) Thanks so much for your lovely comment.


  55. February 23, 2011 1:18 PM

    You’ve got talent and you made me laugh on this cold, dark winter’s day. Thanks for sharing your talent with us!


    • February 24, 2011 8:22 AM

      Yes, one gets tired of shivering with the cold. Good to shake with laughter now and then– helps one’s circulation… : ) Thanks for your kind comment, very glad you stopped by!


  56. February 23, 2011 1:19 PM

    Great sketches! I like the dating website one, with the profiles matching the judge!


    • February 24, 2011 8:28 AM

      Yes, that judge was very naughty, and he ought to be “benched.” Oh wait, he’s a judge, he’s already sitting on the bench… : ) Thank you very much for your kind comment!


  57. RosdeT permalink
    February 23, 2011 1:29 PM

    Very funny, and creative. 😉


    • February 24, 2011 8:31 AM

      Glad you enjoyed the sketches. Many thanks for your kind comment, I’m very glad you stopped by! : )


  58. February 23, 2011 2:11 PM

    Congrats. on being freshly pressed since you and I are fans, readers of another blog for bloggers. 🙂

    Hope you’ll get more client work as a result of this. It’s fun to do satirical pieces for legal world. I’m sure it provides them small moments of levity.


    • February 24, 2011 8:40 AM

      Thanks, Jean. Yes, recognized you straight away as a fellow TT fan. Getting “pressed” has been quite an experience. Wonderful to think there are so many kind and supportive people out in cyberspace– you being an obvious example! : ) Keep cycling, and thanks so much for your kindness and encouragement.


  59. crazyoldladyinguadalajara permalink
    February 23, 2011 6:55 PM

    Very funny. I was on a matchmaker site many years ago and one guy posted a photo of himself 10 years younger and 100 pounds lighter. lol


    • February 24, 2011 8:49 AM

      Hmm… sounds like there’s really no need for matchmaker sites to post bogus photos– subscribers can handle that part themselves! : ) Many thanks for your good-humored comment.


  60. February 24, 2011 3:12 PM

    I really enjoyed reading your site. You inspire me a lot on the technique and content.
    I just start off a comic/ art blog. You encourage me to work harder and set you as my goal.

    Thanks sharing


    • February 24, 2011 4:26 PM

      Thank you for your very kind comment. I’m flattered. I’m glad you found the site helpful, you are always very welcome here. It’s hard getting started, but don’t get discouraged. One step at a time. –or should I say one sketch at a time? : ) Good luck, and thanks for stopping by!


  61. February 24, 2011 6:39 PM

    great stuff, keep it up


  62. February 24, 2011 9:53 PM

    Hilarious!! Only when i came to the us, did i truly understand what the suing culture is all about and the cartoons highlight it perfectly!!


    • February 25, 2011 8:37 AM

      The Suing Culture… yes, welcome to America! Perhaps we should replace the Statue of Liberty with a Statue of Litigation– she could be holding a big gavel instead of a torch… say, that sounds like a good idea for a cartoon! : ) Many thanks for your kind comment.


  63. February 24, 2011 10:42 PM

    Thanks for the laughs! Excellent material. Congrats on the FP!


  64. February 25, 2011 8:55 PM

    you drawings are pretty. i wish i could draw like you!


    • February 26, 2011 10:49 AM

      You’re very kind, thank you. Do you draw yourself, then? FWIW: When I look at drawings of mine from years ago, I feel embarrassed. They seem very crude and unsophisticated. But I can see now that it was a stage I needed to work thru. If you draw, keep at it, and remind yourself that you are “on the path.” Cheers and many thanks for stopping by!


  65. February 25, 2011 11:29 PM

    I love your cartoons. They are an art form used to express many different opinions, attitudes, etc. and often smack of satire. My own cartoons are always satirical with hints of humor.


    • February 26, 2011 10:53 AM

      Well said, Joe. It’s always a pleasure for me to meet a fellow cartoonist. Let’s face it: the world needs our special humor!! : ) All the best, and many thanks for stopping by!


  66. February 28, 2011 1:02 AM

    i love ur sketches!! 🙂


    • February 28, 2011 10:03 AM

      u r 2 kind, and the name Little Miss Trouble puts a Little Big Smile on my face… : ) Thanks for your kind support!!



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